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Thursday, October 19, 2006

Special Kids, Special Needs...Thermometer

The last few weeks have been rough for one of my twins. Ryan has always been the one more prone to show symptoms of stress in response to rupture of the status quo. It got so bad for the little guy, that one day alone, he wet himself four times. FOUR!! *sigh* I think that was one of the straws that broke me. Forget the fight he had with his brother at school, forget the way he'd assault his siblings at home with angry words and sometimes, fists. I talked to the Special education teacher and told her he was completely melting down at home. I prayed A LOT, asking the Lord to show me what happened to my precious boy who'd been doing so great in his new school.

Well, I wasn't quite ready for what God showed me. It was me...well, not completely *me* but our entire lives. They'd been in some state of "upheaval" for weeks. I was gone for nearly a week to the ACFW conference, then when I returned, our family drove to Arkansas to bury my husband's grandmother...then I was challenged with the last weeks of my college class, along with the stress of rewriting the ending to a manuscript that a publisher wanted. Sadly, I confess I wasn't the mom I wanted to be in this defining hours. Tired, stressed, know, when life interrupts and demands you bow to it? :-D

So, I've expended great energy toward "doting" on my sons. I mean, they're not getting away with murder or anything, but I'm HEARTILY emphasizing the positive bheavior. For example, the other night, I was putting the boys to bed. Ryan started melting down. So, I turend to Reagan and said, "I"m so glad you're lying in bed and being quiet for us to say your prayers." To my pleasure, Ryan grabbed his attitude and drop-kicked it to the curb.

My point? We are the thermometer in our families. It's a tough fact. But it's true. Yeah, that puts a lot of pressure on us, but this is what God designed us for--motherhood. :-D Our kids are like magnets to our attitudes. What we feel will be reflected in them. If we're down and depressed, that mood filters to them. I'm not saying this to offend anyone, but it's just something God has made real to me these last couple of weeks. I readily admit that our temperature and my magnetic attitude falters at times...c'est la vie. :-D OH! And Ryan's doing much better in case anyone was worried. *wink*

So, what's the temperature like at your house this week?
Ronie Kendig is a wife, mother, and writer working on her degree in Psychology. She currently lives in Texas, homeschools and is in her final semester of college. An avid writer, Ronie specializes in fast-paced fiction in various genres. You can visit her online at her website or blog.


Michelle Pendergrass said...

Your post made me sigh in agreement. I hate it when that happens. It means I know I've been doing thing wrong and need to have a good old fashioned kick in the behind.

Thank you for your very timely wisdom.

Gina said...

Yes, thanks for the kick in the behind! I see so many of my negative traits in my oldest and it makes me wonder if it's hereditary or learned (I think it's a little of both) I'm always on him about changing his negative attitude and then I realize where he's learned it from. :( But I'm trusting God to turn it all around for both of us!

Trish Ryan said...

Singer Nicole Nordeman has a post up on her site expressing something similar - how God calls us to take responsibility for the emotional climate of our lives rather than just letting life swing us around by the tail. I love the idea that we don't have to give in to the prevailing, "I'm so stressed, that's just the way it is, there's nothing I can do" mindset (and I don't even have kids yet!) Kudos to you for sowing into your boys - kind of cool to see how God works :)

T. Suzanne Eller said...

That's a very true post.

:-)Ronie said...

Life sure shovels a lot of crud on us. Just as the saying goes, happiness is a choice--so is everything that comes out of us. It ain't easy...oh, boy, it isn't.