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Sunday, October 22, 2006

Renewing My Mind

Romans 12:2
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.

I used to sit in church and pray that God would just "zap" me and make me the person I really want to be. But after thirty plus years I'm learning that God doesn't work that way - for most of us.

For years I've struggled with certain things, personality flaws so to speak. I've blamed it on my Italian New York upbringing, my parents divorce, the critical people in my life, etc. While that may be part of who I am, it's not the whole me and I don't have to continue to be the person of my youth.

I'm learning that just because I read a parenting book or go through a 12 week Bible study, doesn't mean at the end I will be miraculously transformed. I can't begin to tell you how many books I've read on the same subject and I still struggle with the same things. transformed by the renewing of your mind. Renewing. I guess I could break out all the concordances and go back to the original Hebrew or Greek to find out the origin of this word, but to me it means continual. I need to feed my mind continually so my heart will be bathed in the truth and love of Jesus Christ. Reading a book on parenting isn't going to change me. But when I continue to read books, meditate on scripture and pay attention in church, then my mind will be renewed on a continual basis. Then I will be able to stand against the enemy as he throws his fiery darts my way.

Do I still wish God would just "zap" me and end all my struggles? Sure. But I don't pray for it as much as I did before. I don't except to be miraculous transformed, instead I continue to renew my mind and one day "when He appears, we (I) shall be like Him, for we (I) shall see Him as He is. (1 John 3:2)

Gina Conroy is a homeschooling mom of four, founder of Writer...Interrupted, and writes about how she struggles to balance it all her on her blog Portrait of a Writer...Interrupted. If you happen to figure out how to do it "all" before she does, please leave her a comment!


Calia77 said...

Thank you for sharing. I always wish God would zap me. But He doesn't. I find that only when I accept that I am who I am, for whatever reasons, and stop fighting, God can start working in me and changing me.

Jennifer said...

This is good stuff Gina. You've really been digging deep and being so honest.